7.15.2012

Foreign Wizardry: A (Poorly-Composed) Harry Potter Essay

International Magical Cooperation.


I've been thinking a lot about it lately as I spend what little free time I have whiling away the hours with my nose in Harry Potter. It used to annoy me how there was so little mentioned of foreign witches and wizards in the series, and my annoyance was restored after reading Goblet of Fire again.

Did you know American witches and wizards are mentioned only ONCE in the entire series? To boil down everything America is into a couple of witches at the World Cup, gossiping under a spangled banner is a crime.

And as I sat, obsessing over that tiny window through which the smallest glimpse of foreign wizardry can be seen outside of Europe, I began to construct an alternate HP world in my mind. A more accurate version (in my ever-so-humble opinion, of course).

Picture this though.

You have a dark wizard. Goes by the name of Voldemort. He's your regular, run-of-the-mill, power-hungry lunatic who likes to kill for sport.  Do you think, for one moment, that he isn't going to try to expand his filthy, death-ridden empire? I mean, come on. The man shares his brain with a snake. The day he stops dreaming of world domination is the day I eat my dog.

And I don't have any pets.

It's as likely as this conversation taking place:

Wormtail: "Master, I've been drawing up a few designs. We can take over Spain by the end of the month if we gain control of the water-ways and everyone's minds'. We can be over seas by June if we keep up the pace. We'll need manpower though. Might I suggest recruiting the giants?"

Voldemort: "Quiet, Wormtail! You are too ambitious. I told you from the outset, that if we were going to do this, we were going to do it gradually and cautiously. I don't want to expand further than Great Britain. If I control Britain, that will be enough of me. Don't you know me enough by now to know that I am easily contented with what I have in front of me? I never want more than what I have."


Right. Because that would happen.                  (sarcasm)


My point is, if you were to take the world of Harry Potter and stick it right in the middle of the real world, I believe a few things would be different.

Firstly, we know that Voldemort is quite the world traveler… with his jaunts to Egypt and Albania and whatnot. So why is Britain the only country that seems to be worrying about him? Voldemort is cray, and there is little chance that he wouldn't want to destroy all the other countries in the the world as well, so I think the books should have definitely included more of this aspect. And I think the magical leaders of those countries should have done some allying up. Which brings me to my next point.

Given American's foreign policy, if there was a powerful, muggle-killing, snake-man on the loose in Europe, I hardly doubt Americans wouldn't go try and stop him. I mean just look at our track record… We're basically just a whole bunch of crazy Gryffindors brandishing our swords and yelling out profanities in the name of Justice… Our national Magical Military would be the first on the scene, shouting out the mantra, "You will like democracy!" while forcing Voldemort into a in a red and white striped straightjacket with fireworks shooting out their wands. If Voldemort were real, we would have tried to stop him. I'm not saying we would have been able to for sure, but we would have at least been there in the thick of things.

And speaking of being in the thick of things, why are there only three wizarding schools allowed in the Tri-Wizard cup? Why couldn't it be the Icosa-Wizard cup and allow twenty schools to compete? I know that it was originally created for the three largest European schools, but why the exclusion? Why can't those overseas play? What about Africa? I'm sure they'd love a shot. What's wrong with our Australian friends? Not good enough? Silliness.


You know, I'd be happy with even a minor change in the series. For instance, would it have been so bad to make Luna a foreign-exchange student? How hard would that have been? Then we would at least know what a non-European wizarding school was like. And actually, such a program was even alluded to in GOF when Ron mentions that Bill used to have a pen-friend who lived in Brazil. So it's not far-fetched. Really. It's not.

Anyway.

I just don't think that the borders of Great Britain could contain Voldemort. Not at all. So I wish that JK Rowling would have constructed his story line to include the fact that the whole world was against him (of course, it's implied, but I'm just not seeing the action). And if she left it out by design, why? Because that just seems unrealistic to me.


I'm not complaining, I'm just letting my fingers go. They've been itching to do something besides counting pills and change. And JK Rowling, if you're reading this, I'm so honored to have you in my internet presence, and disregard everything I ever wrote. Love, Lexie.

15 comments:

  1. I love this, Lex! Also I adore your new layout..but mainly just your writing. :)

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    1. Thank you!!! This comment made my day!

      I'm glad you like my layout :) I'm hoping to keep this one for a while. I might change the colors, but the layout will probably stay the same.

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  2. Well you have a point. But Voldemort DID desire the world. The entire world was afraid of him. Plus sometimes they did deal with international evil doers. Look at Grindlewald. Dumbledore went over to kick his pasty evil ass. Though I'm not too sure he counts seeing as he knew Dumbledore. I think for the most part wizards kept to themselves though. It was expressed in GOF they were all jealous and paranoid of eachother. It wouldn't be too surprising if Britain just hushed up the Voldemort affair and pretended nothing was happening.

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    1. Yea Grindelwald was European though. And actually lived in Britain for a little while. So he doesn't count.

      And also... I know Voldemort desired the world. That was kind of my point. And yes, the whole world SHOULD be afraid of Voldemort…but I don't really remember an instance where this was witnessed.

      I guess my whole thing is… *we don't know* if Britain hushed up Voldemort and *we don't know* if other nations were aware of his rise to power, and *we don't know* if there was any foreign help. Because it was just never written. I guess that's why I wrote this. Because I just wish it was specified. It seems important enough to deserve at least some detail.

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  3. Why are you so good at writing stuff? It makes me seething with envy.

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  4. I agree with Izzy :P

    I was actually going to make a post where I highlight a few points that I've discovered/thought of that JK Rowling never mentioned or explained. Obviously because I'm super obsessive about this series and want to know every last detail lol!

    I agree with you that Voldemort would have desired the world, I think he was just hell bent on killing Harry first. The only people the wizards told was the human prime minister and that was it basically lol

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    1. That is true. He needed Harry first. Definitely kind of quite an obsession of his hahaha
      So I guess that makes sense that his plan for world domination wasn't the main theme… I don't know. I guess I just wish there were more. He should have had a secret task-force run by a few deatheaters who would have worked on the expansion part of his magical takeover while he focused on Harry. Hahahaha each of the books are too big to hold and I want more :)

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    2. Lol maybe he didn't trust anyone enough to tackle other countries? After all, the only person he trusted was Snape and he killed him!

      I don't blame you for wanting more - I do too!

      An extra question just for you. There were 5 boys in Harry's year - Seamus, Dean, Neville, Ron and Harry and they slept in the boys dormitory. But there obviously must have been more rooms for the other boys in older years. Did they change rooms as they progressed up the the years? I've been given this too much thought haven't I lol?

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    3. No I thought about that too! I'm pretty sure they just stayed in the same one throughout the years. And the dormitory of the 7th year boys would go to the 1st year boys the following year. I'm assuming. hahahaha I'm giving it too much thought as well :)

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  5. My latest post may interest you!

    http://pablosangel.blogspot.co.uk/2012/07/help-will-always-be-given-at-hogwarts.html

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    1. I read it and really liked it! I'm glad we think the same :)

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    2. Well we are practically twins after all. That is, if you ignore the fact that I was born two days before you and in a different continent... But those are only minor details!

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  6. How odd. Yesterday I was browsing Goodreads.com and I found a published e-book Harry Potter fanfiction about James Potter, Harry Potter's son, and his adventures at Hogwarts. I haven't read it but supposedly it's good. I read that the author sent the manuscript to J.K. Rowling, and I guess she liked it. The author's American, so they start incorporating a lot of American stuff into Hogwarts, like American characters. If fanfiction doesn't sicken you, it might be interesting to read!

    Anyway, it's pretty weird how Voldemort limits himself to such a small country. It feels very alienating that we only know about how Britain responds to it. Ugh, Jo.

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    1. oh wow that's cool! I should check that out. It definitely would be interesting to read about American characters even if JK Rowling didn't write it herself :)

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